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Depression makes it hard to do anything. I’ve been trying to do homework, make phone calls and send emails for the past few days but I have no motivation or energy to do it. I thought I was just being lazy and distracted but the reality is this dark cloud I’m dealing with sucks all the drive out of me. :( The thing that sucks the most is I’m falling back into bad habits and it’s scaring Tristan. Not only that, I have a really important project I’m trying to work on around LGBTQ+ Youth of color, but I can barely pull myself out of bed.
I can’t write anything because anytime I try to words get lost or I remind myself of how horrible I am at everything. I’m also realizing that its getting harder and harder for me to stay focused on school when I really just want to be doing political organizing. I am not trying to make my work primarily about the subjects I care about but I know (feel like) they won’t be good enough for anyone. ever. :(
This is where my mind has been for the past 2 weeks.
